


it's you that i adore

by platonics



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: 5+1 Things, Crushes, Friends to Lovers, Implied Relationships, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Killing Game Was A Virtual Reality Simulation (Dangan Ronpa), M/M, Post-Canon, Pre-Game Amami Rantaro, Pre-Game Saihara Shuichi, Rejection, Saihara Shuichi-centric, Virtual Reality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-26
Updated: 2019-11-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:22:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21575974
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/platonics/pseuds/platonics
Summary: Five times Shuichi rejected someone, and one time he didn't.
Relationships: Akamatsu Kaede & Saihara Shuichi, Amami Rantaro & Saihara Shuichi, K1-B0 & Saihara Shuichi, Momota Kaito/Saihara Shuichi, Oma Kokichi & Saihara Shuichi, Saihara Shuichi & Yumeno Himiko
Comments: 4
Kudos: 114





	it's you that i adore

**Author's Note:**

> if the tags didn't make it obvious, yes, the end ship is saimota. i like all the potential ships in this fic to varying degrees tbh, it was a little hard to decide which it should be, but i've never written saimota so! something new. 
> 
> other than all the shuichi ships, there's a brief implication of himiko being in a relationship, but no name is said, so it can be whoever you want rly (tho i had korekiyo in mind while writing it). bc of this, possible warning for proposed cheating? is it cheating if you think your s/o is brain dead but it later turns out they're not and they wake up? i'm not sure, but that's what happens.
> 
> this takes place in a vr au, and the timespan of the entire fic stretches roughly a year, from auditions for v3 to several months post-game!

**i.**

Thousands of teens at this Danganronpa convention would quite literally kill to be where Shuichi was right then. Standing in front of Amami Rantaro, the recipient of that well-practiced, playboy grin. Even before becoming a celebrity as the Ultimate Adventurer, he was popular, at least in Shuichi’s neighborhood. They used to go to the same high school, though he was sure the man standing before him wouldn’t remember that.

“You’re cute,” Amami said, leaning in closer and glancing down at the sheaf of papers in his hand. Among them was the confirmation of his audition number, printed out just that morning. Others might try to hide it from prying eyes, but not Shuichi. He was proud of his choice.

“Oh, auditioning?” Amami continued, crossing his arms and raising one perfectly groomed eyebrow. “Well, I suppose I should’ve guessed. Plenty of fans want to get in on the action themselves. I was the same way once.”

His flirty smile had faded into something that looked almost pained, and he was no longer gazing right into Shuichi’s eyes. In that moment, he didn’t seem like the celebrity survivor he became so fond of at all.

“Once?” Shuichi echoed. “What do you mean? You don’t like the show anymore?”

“I’m grateful for all the support, and I hope everyone will be very happy with where things go next season.” A practiced line, it was obvious. Perhaps sensing his distaste, Amami softened some, shaking his head. “Ah, look, it’s not something I can really discuss with fans, y’know. But I’m happy to chat about other things if you’re interested. Maybe we could grab a coffee or something later?”

Shuichi looked at him, thinking of the character he loved to watch on TV, and found him lacking. He didn’t even like Danganronpa anymore? What a disappointment. No dedication to the project whatsoever.

“I have plans, unfortunately. But thank you very much for the offer, Amami-kun. With any luck, maybe I’ll see you in the killing game.”

**ii.**

Akamatsu was radiant, like an angel. She was kind, and encouraging, and everything a good leader should be. Shuichi wished he could have her confidence, or her charisma. Just feeling her smile on him was a blessing. 

She gave him the courage to use his detective skills and try to find a way out of this mess, not knowing what new tragedies would soon be unfolding.

“If we have time, I’d love to play a few songs for you later,” she said, giving his arm a reassuring little squeeze. “I took a look in my lab, and the piano there seems really nice, even if it was set up by Monokuma.” With a soft giggle, Akamatsu added, “Maybe I could even teach you how to play. I bet you’d be a natural at it, Saihara-kun.”

“A-ah, well, I’m not so sure about that,” Shuichi demurred, reflexively hiding behind his hat. “I don’t have much experience with anything musical. But maybe, with the Ultimate Pianist teaching me.”

“You have to have more faith in yourself! Besides, learning a new skill takes time, right? It might not happen right away. We...can continue with our lessons even after we get out of here.” Akamatsu sounded so confident, so certain that everything would work out. Did it really seem so easy in her head? Catching the mastermind, ending this killing game, and going on to live as friends back home?

“Right. Of course. If you believe in me, Akamatsu-san, then of course I’ll do my best. I’d...like to stay close once we get out of here.”

“Mhm, me too, so it’s a promise!” She beamed. They were close enough that Shuichi could smell her floral perfume. “Now c’mon, let’s go to the library and set up these cameras.”

It wasn’t until he was on the courtroom floor, cheek stinging from Momota’s punch, that he wondered pointlessly whether Akamatsu might have been asking him out.

**iii.**

“Aww, Saihara-chaaan. You’re really gonna hurt my feelings if you keep playing so hard to get, y’know. I might start thinking you really don’t love me at all.” Ouma pouted, lower lip quivering. His eyes glittered. One delicate hand tugged anxiously at his hair. He shifted from foot to foot. All the signs of a liar about to burst into crocodile tears. Shuichi already had a headache.

“What do you want, Ouma-kun? I’m not in the mood for your games today.”

Predictably, that only seemed to make Ouma even more determined to annoy him. Didn’t he ever get tired of pestering people? That might be one of the biggest mysteries in the academy.

“How dare you call my love for you a game? And after all I’ve done for you?” he wailed. Right on cue. Three, two, one...Tears. Shuichi’s head hurt even more now, and yet he wavered in the doorway as Ouma sobbed and sniffled. He could just walk away. There was nothing stopping him. Sure, he might get followed, but he might not. No way to know for sure until he tried. And yet, he stayed where he was, glad that at least no one else was in the dining hall to witness this spectacle.

“What exactly have you done for me, then? That’s a total lie.”

Instantly, Ouma perked up, cheeks still wet with tears until he wiped them away with a sleeve. Then it was like he was never crying at all. The picture of cherubic innocence.

“Damn, you got me. I guess that’s why Saihara-chan’s a detective, huh? So he can figure out all my nefarious schemes. Not aaaall of what I said was a lie though,” he said. “I don’t want anything from you right now but the pleasure of your company.”

Shuichi raised an eyebrow, at a loss for what to say. Ouma was looking at him so hopefully, as if there was a chance he might bestow the greatest gift in the world on him. Could he be serious about this? Could there actually be some part of him that genuinely liked him and wanted a positive interaction?

“Come to the A/V room with me, Saihara-chan! Let’s watch a horror movie and kiss during the scary parts.” He bounded over, tugging at Shuichi’s hand as if to drag him out of the room and down the hall.

No. No way. That was impossible. Ouma didn’t have a genuine bone in his body.

“No thanks, I have plans with Momota. Find someone else to bother.”

**iv.**

“Saihara-kun, I have a favor to ask of you, if you’re willing to hear me out.” Shuichi could practically hear Kiibo whirring, something that wasn’t typical at all. He must be really worked up for fans to be kicking on.

“Ah, uh, sure, Kiibo-kun. What’s up?”

“It’s come to my attention that there’s a shameful gap in my knowledge of what it means to be human. I’ve studied extensively, of course, but I’m starting to think this particular subject needs to be experienced for itself in order to be fully understood. It requires someone else’s involvement, and I trust you not to be robophobic about it.”

“...I see.” Frankly, Shuichi didn’t know what to say. He didn’t even know what it was yet, and already he was wishing to be free of it. But...was that unfair of him? Kiibo was a friend after all, and friends did things for each other. It might even be a nice distraction from all the tragedies he couldn’t do anything about. It might be fun. He shouldn’t be thinking all pessimistically when he didn’t have all the information. That seemed like something Akamatsu would say.

“Well, I’ll try to help you if I can. What is it that you need me to do?”

Kiibo’s reply was delivered so calmly, as if it was a perfectly normal thing to request from a friend. It only increased the intensity of Shuichi’s reaction in comparison.

“I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend. Like a practice relationship, so I can understand how to be romantic.”

Shuichi broke into a coughing fit, his own saliva trying to choke him. Eyes watering, he gasped for breath, one hand clutching at his heart. Pretend or not, he hadn’t been remotely prepared to get that kind of proposition. Especially not from Kiibo who, frankly, wasn’t the person he’d like to get it from.

“I, um...I don’t think I’m the best person to do that for you, Kiibo-kun,” he wheezed. “I don’t have any experience with relationships either, y’know. I just don’t really feel comfortable doing it. Sorry.”

“Not a problem. I understand.” Kiibo’s expression didn’t betray any hard feelings, but the speed at which he walked away left Shuichi feeling guilty all the same. No one ever told him that being the person doing the rejecting felt nearly as shitty as being the one getting rejected.

**v.**

“I’ve been thinking.” Yumeno’s lazy drawl pierced the air, accompanied by the rustling of her sneakers dragging in the wood chips. They were the only two in the park, swinging on the playground swings as if in an attempt to regain some of the youth they lost. The chains were cold against Shuichi’s hands, but not painfully so. It was bracing. Perhaps that was the right word.

“Oh, yeah? What about?” He kept his tone soft, perfect for the role of the big brother type friend. Protector. Yumeno was sometimes easy to upset nowadays, since the end of the killing game. They were having a nice enough day, so he didn’t want to accidentally set her off. 

“Maybe we should date.” Yumeno didn’t look him in the eyes when she said it. Brushing scarlet fringe out of her eyes, she started swinging again instead.

Oh. Shuichi really wasn’t expecting that. He inhaled sharply, the suddenness of it making his lungs ache. Then he started swinging too, because nothing about that sentence made sense when he was sitting still.

“Yumeno,” he ventured. “I’m not sure where this is coming from. I didn’t think you felt that way about me.”

“I don’t,” she replied bluntly, quick enough that he might have been offended in other circumstances, if it was coming from someone else. As it stood, he didn’t feel that way about Yumeno either, and he understood that she wasn’t as insensitive as she seemed sometimes. “But I don’t want to die alone either, and there’s no way any of us will ever end up with someone normal. All those people don’t understand us.”

He got what she was saying. He understood that kind of bone-deep loneliness, as much as he wished he didn’t. That longing for someone who wasn’t there. He swung higher, faster, the cold breeze whipping against his face.

“They might all still wake up someday. It’s only been a few months...it’s too soon to give up hope,” Shuichi said, trying to convince himself as much as her. “Don’t you want to wait for—” 

“Of course I do!” Yumeno exclaimed, louder than he expected her to. A bird took flight, startled by her voice. “But...I have to live life facing forward, right? Can I do that if I’m just...waiting? Is that okay?”

“I don’t know. But I don’t think this is the answer. Think about it awhile longer.”

**vi.**

Everyone woke up. Even though Shuichi said all along that there was a chance, he didn’t really believe it until it happened. There were so many emotions, so many people to see, so many things to do.

So many, and yet he didn’t even need to think about who to go to first.

Momota looked weak and drawn, but still far better than the last time he saw him. Shuichi couldn’t stop a smile from spreading across his face, nor would he want to. He sat down on the edge of the hospital bed, and Momota swung an arm tight around him, bringing him closer.

“Hey there, how’s my sidekick? Have you been takin’ care of Harumaki?”

“Yeah, of course,” he replied easily, glad to see that simulated death didn’t seem to have taken too much of a toll on his best friend. “Yumeno-san too. We’ve been doing okay, but we’re — _I’m_ — really glad you’re awake.” Shuichi’s voice wobbled towards the end, a threat of incoming tears, and he tried to hold back so Momota wouldn’t notice.

He noticed anyway, ruffling a hand through Shuichi’s hair with a soft laugh.

“C’mon, what’re you crying for? No way you thought some fake execution was enough to take down the Luminary of the Stars, right? I’m not even sick anymore. Everything’s okay.”

“Yeah, I know,” he breathed, offering a shaky smile. Then he averted his gaze, down to the hospital sheets, fidgeting. “I just missed you. Isn’t that what a sidekick does?”

So quickly he might have imagined it, he saw Momota’s gaze drop to his lips. But then it was over, and nothing happened. Momota reached over and brushed a tear from his cheek, thumb warm against his skin. It felt almost as intimate as a kiss.

“Once they let me outta this place, we have to go somewhere to celebrate, alright?” Momota was probably trying to get him to stop crying, but he sounded like he was already getting genuinely pumped up. “Just the two of us. It’ll be awesome.”

“Yeah,” Shuichi agreed earnestly. “For sure.”

_Better than being on either side of the equation was when there was no rejection at all._


End file.
